Talking about confidence

[chrisvenus]

I read something that suggested that finding out more about confidence from the point of view of others was helpful to building your own self-confidence. So here we go. I am at times very un-confident in myself so I am going to ask a few questions to get people going on the subject. If you want to add in more comments or questions then feel free. I have a vague feeling I did something similar before but now I'm copying from a book so it will be much better. Anonymous posting welcome if you don't want to put your name to your answers. :)

1) What do you think confidence is?

2) Where does confidence come from?

3) Can you think of someone who is completely confident?

4) How can you tell if someone is confident or not?

5) How do you feel when you talk to someone who is not at all confident?

6) Does a confident person always feel confident?

and my own one for number 7:

7) What is the difference between being confident and acting confident?


I will try to put up my own answers later but I don't have time right now.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

1) What do you think confidence is?

I think confidence is the ability to carry yourself with ease, to place your worries and troubles into a place in your mind so that you may continue your daily life, and do your job without concern. I think that confidence is the ability to do somethings, and do it well. To recognise that you are capable, useful and balanced.

2) Where does confidence come from?

Confidence comes from a sum of things: experience that can be drawn from, common sense that is applied, self worth that is respected and an attitude that acts as both shield and weapon.

3) Can you think of someone who is completely confident?

I cannot.

4) How can you tell if someone is confident or not?

In a stressful situtation or in a social situation, you will find those who seem to float along. These are the ones who can take the hit and still sail on, these are the ones who can take criticism, work on it and come back. A person is confident not because they can be loud or the life of the party, but because they are able to function without need of praise or ceasing because they have run into trouble.

5) How do you feel when you talk to someone who is not at all confident?

I feel worried. Often I see myself and my own worries and concerns reflected back at myself. I wonder what I can do to help them, and therefore in the long run help myself. In the coldest sense I see them as experiments. People I can try out various coping methods out upon, and discover if they will be successful or not before I attempt to apply that to myself. However, conciously I know that that is pointless since no-one will react as I will. I am a coward in the face of others that remind me of myself.

6) Does a confident person always feel confident?

No. It is impossible to keep up this level of confidence at all times, as I have defined it. Everyone needs down time.

and my own one for number 7:

7) What is the difference between being confident and acting confident?

Being confident means that you can function without need of praise, and can continue to function despite critisim. This means in a social situation or indeed in the work situation.

The nature of my job does require me to appear to be more confident that I actually am. It helps, but only because it helps me to do my job. In this, acting confident only puts off the inevitable crash at the end of the day when I cannot cope any longer.


I hope that this has help.